~By Wendy Zangari
I have to apologize for not being around the past few weeks, Greg has been helping me as much as he can with the vegetable garden, pictures are to follow at some point.
During this time I have also been helping my friend, who has now been in the hospital for 3 weeks.  The reason I am writing about knowledge being your empowerment and not fearing the unknown is because I have been dealing with this person’s boyfriend who is a frantic mess all of the time and I want to help him, but he is beyond any help with no respect for himself or others.
My friend had to break up with him due to him not respecting her wishes and not understanding that he is stressing her out by him not empowering himself with knowledge of her disease as well as speaking about his divorce and his child that is seven years old, wearing diapers, and using a binky, yes folks you heard me correctly, while my friend is in the hospital and just had major surgery. These things are why some people are not growing emotionally in this world.  To understand life you have to experience it full force, if you are afraid all of the time how can you experience anything? You can’t!
If you want to see the world as it is, you can see it as it is, OR you can make it what you want it to be, it is your choice and your choice only. I cannot make anyone do what they do not want to do, or accept what I want them to accept. They cannot understand unless they have gone through their own suffering. I have found that you cannot have compassion or empathy unless you yourself have gone through major trials and tribulations in life; you will not have an understanding of another’s situation otherwise and cannot put yourself in their shoes.
How can one person in this world empower themselves with knowledge?
You can read all there is to know about the subject or situation, learn all you can about your body and your behaviors, analyze yourself, look inside your soul and find out why you react the way you react. Find out why you say things that you say to others that are perhaps inappropriate for the time and place of the situation. Learn who you are, don’t fear the unknown of who you are!  You can be an amazing person, but may not know it just yet, learn to love yourself before you try to love another.
Don’t let another tell you how to live, what to do, and where to go. You are your own person even when married or in a relationship, do not lose yourself in a relationship only to find out that you are very insecure and need a parent, not a partner. If you find you are looking for a parental type figure, perhaps you should look inside to find out why you are clinging on to a person for dear life only to find out that you are not a whole person and have many lessons to learn that you missed along the way.
You cannot go into a relationship as a half person, two halves, in this case, do not make a whole!  Grow, learn, laugh, play was our way as children, our light hearts at that point in time allow us to be free from the shackles that oppress us! Learn to grow, learn, laugh, and play again, it is within us as it was from the beginning of time.
Knowing what we know now, can empower us to move on into tomorrow.  You cannot expect different results when you keep repeating the same behaviors over and over again, therefore we should be more playful and loving and care free knowing that we are free from our own prisons that we are captured from within and adhering to societal expectations. Why?  Why limit yourself?
Insecurity gives into fear, anxiety gives into fear, confusion gives into fear, the unknown gives into fear!  In order to gain security, work on yourself, get to know you!  It can be a lifelong process, but it is worth it to get to know yourself so you do not fear who you are and what is around you.  To gain knowledge is to get rid of anxiety, what you know can help you better understand situations you might be in. To get rid of confusion look inside to find what is really confusing your thought process, take it apart, piece by piece, because otherwise you will continue to be confused, anxious, and insecure and fear the unknown.
Take the situation you are in and reverse the roles as best you can and see how you might feel if someone says something that you said, that might have hurt or offended another. Analyze this, see what the underlying cause is for your reactions or actions.  This process can be painful as you will get into the deep root of your issues and it might not be pretty.  In order to get through it you have to go back through these situations and fix these idiosyncrasies that you have created for yourself that others are offended by.
Don’t ever stop learning about who you are and what you can do to make yourself a better person to yourself and others! Be kind to yourself, be gentle with yourself and others, take into consideration the situation and put yourself in the other person’s shoes to understand where they are coming from.
Grow, grow, grow, don’t stop growing!
If I can do it in life, so can all of you!  I have faith in humanity, but you have to grow and never stop learning new ideas, new ways of doing things, new perspectives, and never stop growing!
It’s sad to see how fear of the unknown and insecurity, as well as not empowering yourself with knowledge, can immobilize someone to the point where they only see black and white and no gray, then go into panic mode. There is gray, you just have to find it and don’t stop searching until you do find the middle of the road, because there is more than one way to answer a question and more than one way to find a solution.  Don’t ever stop learning and growing, you are important and you need to love yourself in order for you to love others.
Go find yourself, grow a garden like we are, try new things, learn about those new things, enjoy your empowerment! Grow! Grow! Grow!

© 2012, Ready For The Shift. ™ Wendy & Greg Zangari, All rights reserved. Permission is granted to copy and redistribute these articles on the condition that the content remains complete and in tact, full credit is given to the author(s), and that it is distributed freely.

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